how long did you wait?--from the gURL boards

strwberrywine11 says, "How long did were you dating your bf (or gf) before you had sex? How old were you? Do you wish you waited longer?

I am almost 20 and have been dating my bf for about a month. We are both virgins. I want to wait at least 4 months before I sleep with him and he's okay with that. I just wanted some perspective on how that compares with other girls' experiences."

What do you think? Leave a comment below. Or, if you want to join the discussion on the boards, go to the relationships and sex board.

Comments

[LILLY]

i was sadly!!!!!!!...........7 when i llost it to a 12year old. i totaly regret it. PLEASE all kids UNDER~16 WAIT TILL YOU KNOWN HIM FOR AT LEAST 2 YEARS it is not worth it unless your with the 1 u love~!~ im now 13 and nevver had sex with anyone except that day

[Hill]

my first time I was 14 and the guy was 17. he wasn't my boyfriend just a friend but, i was really curious so we did it. i don't seriously regret it and let it bother me because weather he was a boyfriend or not i was young so there was still a big chance that we wouldn't still be together (i'm 18 now), these things happen in life, so it's not a big deal to me. most people don't stay with their "first" now days because they have sex young and want to experience more things.

[Ashley]

my boyfriend and i have been dating for 9 months. we are both seniors in high school. however, we had sex a month after we started dating[we were both 17].

i am on the pill. best choice i ever made. it will save you the worry if you are currently having unprotected sex. since both of us were virgins, i haven't had to worry about STDs.

im realistic, i realize things could happen. we could break up, go to separate schools. but as this reality hits, i realize that i made the right choice. even if something bad happens, he is still a great guy and i love him a lot.

[Kami]

I lost my virginity when I was 17 years old, to my boyfriend who was 15 at the time. I always had told myself I would wait until I was in love, yet we had sex only after a week of dating. And I do regret having sex that soon. My hormones took over my morals. We continued to be sexual active, (we dated off and on for a year) and I had to deal with the consequences, like my first yeast infection, and having to obtain the morning-after-pill due to a broken condom. However in the end, I don't regret the sexual experiences themselves, just who they were with, since the guy ended up being abusive.

Now I am 18, and dating a very sweet guy, who is a virgin, and it's weird to be the one in the relationship with more experience. However we have already talked about sex and we're not rushing into anything. If we do end up having sex,I want to make sure it's the right moment, and that it's something we're both comfortable doing.

I want it to be something special second time around. Almost like losing my virginity a second time. (Though it's not possible physically, but I want to feel that way emotionally).

[vlc93]

i was 15 and my guy was 15. i was with him for 2 years before i did anything. i have no regrets even though we are not together anymore i still feel like he was the right person to loose it to

[cnm42004]

I was 16 and the guy was 24...I wish i would have waited 2 more years but I don't regret..we had sex for a about a year and i broke up with him..he was still having sex with his baby mother i didn't need the drama!

[Nitisha]

I dated him for 8 months. i was 16. And yes i do regret doing it with him because at that point in time i thought i was in love but it turned out that i wasn't. Now Im 17 and me and my first are not together but still like bestfriend.

Now me and my current boyfriend have been together for like 3 months and started having sex about a month ago..

[ashes]

as for those young girls who are having sex (under 16) please be careful! ... and remember that you don't have to have sex now... and you can always say no!!! I plan on waiting for at least a yr b4 doing it wiv my current boyfriend.... and he UNDERSTANDS... he used to be a player so he says he got enough sex to 'last 2 lifetimes'.... oh yeah... n btw... he hasnt got any STDs!!.... watch out for those!!

[ashes]

I'm 17... technically still a virgin.... Got a really nice guy by my side, but he's 21 and he's used to getting sex. I told him that i'm not up for it yet and he understands.... i just hope that I can practise some self-restraint!!.... he's a really nice guy! ... n i'm VERY attracted to him... but i'm gonna wait!! coz sex will always be there... it's not running away!!

[jezzy123]

it all depends on what sex means to you ..
if it is something very important to you then i believe you should plan it out and really know what the outcome can be and if it is what you really want...but it's really your personal decision that you should feel confident and comfortable with,,I have a boyfriend which i already have 3 years with and when we had 4 months we did it and i don't regret it cause it brought us closer and it created a bond that made our relationship stronger but like i said just fell comfortable and confident about it so later on there would be no regrets

[Angelina]

I lost my virginity when I was 10. I had this crush on one of my old friends and he asked me to do it and I didn't see anything wrong with it. We did it standing up and it didn't hurt at all, heck, I barely even remember it. I don't regret it though, as it had absolutely no consequence on my life/ Now I have a 17 year old boyfrien who rocks my world and we have sex every freaking chance we can get. (I'm 15) Sex is the most amazing expirience that you can have, just ABSOLUTELY make sure u use a condom. it didnt matter with the furst time i did it cuz the kid didnt even have sperme, but now i use a condom every time, actually, nearly every day. we love to do it all diffferent places, juust ass long as no one catches u. i sneak overhis house, he sneaks over mine, we do it on his pool, on the rooftop, in his bed, in my bed, in his parents bed, anywhere in either of our houses when the parents are goone, if u ran a blacklight over our furniture ud find cumm everywhere. Def wait until ur comfortable though. if u dont feel comfortable, stick to orl and fingering, those are amazing as well. not everyone's the same. but sex is amazingggg ahhh

[mms:)]

i am 13. me and my boyfriend have been together for almost 6 months (6 months on March 12th <3 ) we have talked and planned out everything, even our protection. Next week for our "anniversary" we are going to stay at a hotel for one night and have a fun time together. also that night, we our planning on losing our virginity together. I really have special feelings for him and he makes me feel like im on top of the world. he feels the same for me and we can not wait! i know we definately wont regret it even if we would break up in the future because he has already been such a big part of my life so it will be a great experienced. make life something fun and dont regret anything:) just have funn:)

[Lejla Melic]

people should have sex when they wanna have sex, you can't be ignorant and tell them to wait for marriage cause some people don't believe in that. I respect people's beliefs and such but there's no need to be ignorant. i'm not waiting for marriage because i don't want to, that's why they're MY BELIEFS, and not yours. if your willing to give up your virginity to someone, then do it.
i regret nothing.
it's just a part of life

[Sasha]

Wait until you're married.

[headnheart]

(please read, not preaching, just stating an opinion) Oh, wow. after reading some of these i am really surprised at how readily some girls are giving up their virginity. this site is almost promoting pain and suffering from what i see. Having sex doesn't necessarily make your relationship stronger, but it usually makes you more attached and need him more. And if you two split, it will hurt that much more (11% of teens split after sex), or it could make you feel like you HAVE to stay together when you really dont WANT to. you really should discuss all of this before you have sex with him. I'm NOT saying you should wait until marriage, just that you should wait until BOTH of you are ready and know that afterwards, one won't end up very hurt. just looking out for you girl!!! (my bf and i have dated for 16 months now)

[xxsoxmexx]

i am 15, i have been with my boyfriend for just over 4 months. we were both virgins but on friday the 13th of february (this month) we decided we were ready to do it. it hurt abit but i dont regret it because i love him :)

[jess]

i'm seventeen and i just lost it this month... we've only been going out for about four months, but it was an excellent experience and i don't regret it at all. mostly because we're so comfortable with each other and all that. i was definitely ready... still haven't told my mother, however. not quite sure how to bring it up :P

[dan_imac]

Im 13 but i lost my virginity at 11 wid my niebour who was 13 at were still together n i dont regret it cause it was special and he was gentil i luve im and he loves me n even now we still have sex and threesomes wid my older sister.

[abby]

wait untill your ready. dont put a time limit on it when its ment to happen it will but i think you should love the guy you have sex with it makes it so much better
i was about 14 almost 15 when i lost mine and the boy and i where together 6 months before it happend. i truly loved this boy and still do even though we are no longer together. but i think cuz i love him it was worth it and i will never ever regreat it!

[twilightlover]

You should wait until you get married or at least responsible enough to use protection. 12 and 13 year olds should not have sex at all.

[kim]

DOES SEX HURT???? THANKS.....KIM

[PAMELA]

i lost it when i waz 14
and yes i do regret it
after i lost it
i went out with diz other guy
we had sex like 4-6 times
and i regret it sooo much
i think u should wait
until u really know wat sex is

[JP]

Hey. I'm 14, and still consider myself a virgin. However, I've been as far as oral sex. The first guy I messed with was a definite player, even though he was younger than me. I don't regret the experience itself, but I do regret that it had to be with him. It's a little harder to orgasm now that we've done stuff together (can one build an immunity to masterbation?). My current boyfriend (of ten months :) ) and I haven't gone farther than oral, and we're happy. He's incredible at what he does, and we're in love. I think are inevitable... but sometimes good choices are easy too.

[LovesHim]

I Was 14. I dated my boyfriend for a year and six months...and we are still going out. i dont regret. if i hadn't met him i would still be a virgin. i really do love him.

[lavonna]

i am 14....i lost it at 13 2 a guy i didnt kno......i was pushed into it.....i really regret it and my bf reminds me that in did it with that guy.....the day b4 we met.....he makes me cry all the time....so i think it would be good idea if u really think about it......i should have...and wish i did....

[Amani]

im 12 years old and personally i think its up to you because your 20 years old its your decison your grown dont pressure him or yourself to have sex though if it dosent feel right to you or if your scared you shouldnt do it and if your not married thats a whole diffrent story because im gonna wait till i married to have sex so i can make sure i dotn get a std or anything waiting makes more sense a waaaaaaay les chance of getting stds and if yor really commited then whats the problem and it depends on how you and him feel so honestyly both of you should sit dow and talk about how you feel how commited your are andit goes on from their to the question if you shiuld wait or not so just take it slow dont rush it or you'll end up getting your feelings hurt because sex has alot of respnsibityties people dont really think about the responsibitlites but theirs alot of them your rmotions friends and whether the sex is good or not lol jk but just take it slow dont rush wish the best of luck (: w/ you and your boyfriend

[laurenM]

I am 20 (about to be 21) and have been dating this guy for a year. He isn't a virgin but is so okay that I am. I know that i am not ready and he gets it and that it is a big deal to me to be ready. the other part of it is that i am not on birth control and I REFUSE to have sex until I am on BC, two of my friends have had abortions due to pregnancies in school and several more have had to take the morning after pill--that emotional and physical distress just isn't worth it. Emotionally I wANT to have sex, I just want to also be sure that I am ready for all of the things that come with it too.

[linda Price]

I waited until i was 23, not really necessarily by choice.
I dated a few people here and there, but that never amounted to anything.
It never came up in my longer relationship of two months lol.
I lost my virginity with my current boyfriend.
We dated about a month before we started having sex.
In some ways i wish i did when i was younger so i could get over some of the awkwardness and the pain.
The first time was so painful and the second time was also painful.
I'm glad he was on top so i didn't have to do much while i was in pain.
I'm glad i waited until i was this guy though, i definitely love him.
He was shy about it so we kind of waited awhile.
Eventually he got the courage to bring it up we did it.
Sex isn't everything.
I find it important but hugging and kissing is just as good.
I would wait until its with someone you trust, whose mature.
Always use protection, even with protection there could be a mistake and you really don't want to be worrying about that stuff.
I think its totally different for girls then boys, its always pleasurable for them but it takes some time to figure out what to do and have him figure it out.
I always had sexual urges when i was younger but its not the same as having sex.
I say masturbate then you know you will enjoy it and you can figure out what you want him to do when the time comes.

[~*~Pauls_girll~*~]

well i am 12 and i am having alot of fellings for this one guy paul we have talked about haveing sex and what we are goin to use for protection i think i love him but idk how its all goin to happen my mom hates his guts so he cant comeover and i cant go on a date with him i have told my mom that i am going to one on my freinds house and met him there and hung out and talked about it but he is 14 and i am 12 is that a big age difference idk i am so confuesed i need help i want to have sex with him to make the relationship stronger and its not the pressur that makes me want to its me i really want to and so does he but we havent gotten around to it yet plz do not call me a slut or any ugly names i just need help

[cvgoddess]

i was 15 . i had been w| my boyfriend for 7 months<3 dont regret ittt . neverr willl . lol

[rachhhh]

alright, i was/am thirteen, i lost it 7 days ago lol, and i don't regret it as of now, me and my bf are still together and we've been dating for two months. wowwww. i know.

[kia_babi]

i was 15
regreted it
but content

wish i waited for that special guy

[Alex]

Uhm, well...I was dating my boyfriend for about 9 months before we had sex.
I was 15 when i did the first time. And he was 16 1/2 i believe.

Now I'm 17, and he's almost 19. And we've been together for a little over two years now.

Honestly, i remember wishing i was still a virgin after we had sex. But that was just me being worried. It's really not as big of a deal as most make it into.

As long as you're responsible, and use protection theres really nothing to worry about.

I dont regret it.

[me]

I lost my virginity when I was eighteen to a guy I knew a little over a week. We continued to have sex and he grew attached to me and we started dating for real. I don't regret anything and waiting until marriage is a big mistake! Would you buy a pair of jeans without trying them on first?

[ashley]

My boyfriend and I waited until we had been together for 3 years to have sex. We are still together and are coming up on our 4 year anniversary. I know that we will be together forever, which is why we decided to have sex. We are not in a place in our lives right now to get married because we are both in college and we want to make sure we are financially stable before settling down with each other. He is not only the love of my life but he is also my best friend. He is almost 20 and I am 19. We waited for three years until we had sex, and I think that was a responsible decision for both of us. We are smart about our decisions and are safe when we have sex.

[Luna]

this will sounds weird but it's true: my boyfriend was the one who made me swore we'll wait until if hopefully we get married one day. I'm fifteen, on my way to finish junior high and he's nineteen, on his way in the first semester of British college. He said that we're both educated person and he wanted to preserve my dignity and virginity. we both took an oath that whatever happened (even if we break up) we will both wait until marriage. I thank God I had him because he had been so gentile. So yeah, DON'T EVER EVER EVER had sex before marriage. there must be someone out there that cares for you to make you wait till marriage

[B*]

Well, I lost my virginity at 13 and he was 16...I wouldn't say I regret it but I'm not too happy about how it happened, I was with him for more than 2 years (on and off) and I stayed with him for less than a year after (although I did used to 'see' him regularly for about 6 months after we split) Anyway he wasn't a virgin and he 'waited' for me for a long time...I told him I was ready about a week before. Then when I was at his house I started to doubt my decision but I didn't say anything for a while, when I finally did I expected him to be ok with it but instead he went a lil crazy. So we didn't do anything because we had a huge arguement but then a few hours later he apoligized and sounded sincere...so we had sex even though I still wasn't sure. Anyway a few weeks later I found out that he had actually been cheating on me for a few months. As you can probably tell our relationship wasn't the greatest in the world (haha) but I still don't regret it because I believe that every mistake you make defines who you are as a person and who you will become...ANYWAY (got slightly distracted lol) to answer your question...you are obviously unsure about what you want otherwise you wouldn't be asking advice on here, when you are ready you will know and you won't have to ask any questions or feel any doubts.

[Kaylesm]

I gave my virginity away when I was 16, he was a virgin as well. I had been with him for 6 months, which seems like a really short time now. We are still together 4 years later and it was a good decision, I'm glad it was with someone i will always love.

[g]

hey, i am 23 now, i waited until i am married, or wait atleast until u know that u are gonna spend the rest of ur life with this person, u can really feel whether ur in love or not, u may feel some lust...but love is the thing that is the hardest, but most passionate to feel. so wait until u know!! these ppl who were 14 and 13 and what not, do not know how to really feel love, u do not develop the most complex part of ur brain until ur atleast 21...so listen to u and ur bf and ur heart

[g]

hey, i am 23 now, i waited until i am married, or wait atleast until u know that u are gonna spend the rest of ur life with this person, u can really feel whether ur in love or not, u may feel some lust...but love is the thing that is the hardest, but most passionate to feel. so wait until u know!! these ppl who were 14 and 13 and what not, do not know how to really feel love, u do not develop the most complex part of ur brain until ur atleast 21...so listen to u and ur bf and ur heart

[Sweetiepie218]

My first time havin sex was at age 15 I turn 17 in 7 days. I wish I would have waited because the guy that I lost my virginity to, I wasn't in love with him and we weren't even dating. Wait as long as possible. Trust me it's worth the wait. Now I look back and I wish I could take it back because I really love this guy and I should have waited for him!

[Wishing She Could Take It Back]

You don't want to do it! I'm 18 and I have been dating my boyfriend for 10 months. I just lost my virginity on thusday night, and it was the biggest mistake I ever made. I wasn't emotionally ready even though I thought I was. We are now having relationship problems stemming from this whole ordeal. Sex makes relationships so much harder. WAIT UNTIL MARRIAGE!

[Sapphire]

Well, as I was reading this whole blog, I was getting horny to be honest. My cousin's boyfriend has asked me repeatedly to have sex with him during a movie. As I wanted to say yes all those times, I said no. I feel bad because I'm telling you all this and my cousin doesn't even know! I can't even look him in the face anymore. At school, theres this super-fine boy that I like. He asked me out and I said yes. I'm in the 6th and he's in the 8th. And yes I'm hot(im so conceited)why else would he date me. When we're making out, he starts to touch me. While I get angry he just smiles. Of Course I broke up with him, but he goes around the school saying how he only wanted to tap me. I didn't want to lie and deny so I said yea, watever. But I'm glad I'm still 13 and haven't losten my virginity.

wwww.myspace.com/grouchityger

[brittany]

I am a 23 year old woman who has been in a very serious relationship for almost a year. I love him more than life and I'm expecting a ring by May and we are both still virgins.

Its hard sometimes to not give in and we definitely struggle but we have made the commitment to ourselves, our families, and our faith to wait until our wedding night....but don't get me wrong, I'm very excited for that night! (We'll probably skip the whole reception!)

[Alyssie]

u ppl r such sluts!!
im waitin till im happily married (=
i mean like havin sex at 14 or 12? or wat ever happen to the LAW!! come on gize i bet u guys r sexc in ur own way dnt loose it like tht its nt worth it

[CHiKiE]

WEll i WAS ONlY 14 WhEN i lOStEd My ViRGENiTy;; TiL THiS dATY I REGREt iT;; i WiSH i CUd Go bAkK ANd ChANgE EVERyTHiNG;; i WiSh i CUd StAY A ViRGiN At lEASt Til i WAS dONE WiTH SCHOOL At lEASt

[Paris]

just wait til marriage

[Chic13]

Well I havent started talking to boys yet and I am a virgin. But I often watch porn and get orgasisms. Then I find myself fingering myself for about five minutes. Sex looks painful but its sometHong everyone wants.

[Bess]

OKAY. SO I'M 19 NOW. I HAD JUST TURNED 17 WHEN I FIRST MADE THE DECISION TO HAVE SEX. MY BOYFRIEND, DANIEL AND I HAD BEEN DATING FOR A LITTLE MORE THAN YEAR...WE'RE STILL TOGETHER. I DON'T REGRET IT AT ALL AND I KNOW I WANT TO MARRY HIM SOME DAY. BUT REALLY, YOU'RE THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN DECIDE WHEN IS RIGHT FOR YOU! GOOD LUCK!

[danie]

if your asking people online
your NOT ready.