no more mr. “nice guy”...please!

are "nice guys" really that nice?

view comic:
no more mr. “nice guy”...please!

art & story by:
rachel nabors

Comments

[Tessa The Moo]

lol thats the best way ive ever heard of to deal with "nice guys". go rachel! =D

[NicishGuy]

Erm... I think I can be both, it depends on the girl in question. But I don't think I'm THAT bad a "nice guy". Sometimes I'm a genuine guy friend and sometimes I harbour secret interest, but I never regret it or explode if it doesn't work out, I just blame myself for not having the balls.

(Even though I've been avoiding calling myself a nice guy, I just realised I blew it with the first sentence. I just get told that a lot. =[)

[Cassandra]

I understand this completely. I have had guy friends like this. The "nice guy". One that i thought was a real nice guy turned out to be the crazy nice guy. He kept asking me if i was still with the guy was dating. He kept calling and texting and asking me why i didn't answer. He was always looking for attention or ways to talk about himself. I went crazy trying to find a way to get rid of him without being completely mean. *shakes head* it's sad... and sometimes disturbing.

[Hiyoto]

Hmm~ I'm torn. I've been told I'm a nice guy, and I classify myself as a nice guy because of the way I try to respect people. 'course, the only time I throw a hissy-fit when one of my (girl)friends finds someone is because I just don't trust the fellow. *laughs* Otherwise I'm quite content being just friends. I wonder if this makes me somewhere in between. =P Love the comics by the way.

[Kitten]

I read through the comments on here and I understand the perspective of the men and women. I honestly believe there are "nice guys" and there are nice guys. Though girls we have to realize there are nice girls and there are "nice girls". I personally have only one female friend and she is my friend because she is amazing and in my experience the average female will take advantage of her friends and treat them like crap and spread rumors. Is that all women? No. Just like I have male friends who are "nice guys" and it isn't said to flatter myself. I have had many a male friend who seemed to be my friend for the purposes of using me, but I do use that my advantage. I won't lie. I'm not a bad person, but if I know you are trying to use me why not get everything I want from it. The only difference is my friends don't yell at me for not calling because different people are so different. They may not even really want to talk on the phone or IM, but they may want to get in pants. I have one "friend" who is a "nice guy" who one day after I met up with my boyfriend he came to hang out with me and drove to a parking lot and parked the car and then proceeded to try to pull me into having sex with him in his parents van. I laughed in his face and told him to take me back to my car. Some are more obvious than others and some will hide the fact that they want to be with you, but it may be simply out of fear of rejection, but that doesn't necessarily make them a "nice guy".

[J]

This is so true. "Nice Guys" have used me more than any of my asshole boyfriends ever have. "Nice Guys" act like your friend but the minute you reject them, they get all mad and make you feel guilty, like YOU did something wrong and not him, who was basically lying the entire time you were friends with him.

[Adissapointedguy]

Eliz, seriously, you could have said what you did with none of those insults, it was rude and uncalled for. There was no reason to fling insults at me.

[elizaborden]

To a dissappointed guy. there are guys like you and i call them morons-and your the cream of the crop. she didn't mean guys like you you total and complete dipstick! she meant the perverts and if you think this is about you then man......your more moronic than i thought!

[Adissapointedguy]

Also it just annoys me that it seems to demonize the idea of simply enjoying being physically close to friends, I myself love hugs and such and not cause I'm trying to mask feelings for my friends, just cause I like them.

[Adissapointedguy]

You know, I have to say, I have called myself a nice guy at at times and I'm honestly kind of offended that because I do I'm supposedly some sort of stalker creep who's a coward. I've asked out girls who i've liked and I've never pretended to be someones friend because I was too afraid to ask them out. I HAVE asked girls out and I've been rejected generally with something like "Sorry, there just isn't chemistry" or "Sorry, I just like you as a friend" and then, at least five times I've seen this, a girl will go off and go out with a guy who uses them for something. And THEN I read the comic that says that this is my fault for not having the guts to ask a girl out when I have multiple times. Honestly, I thought this comic was a little vindictive.

[Ashley B.]

I have a guy friend who is exactly like this its so hilarious now that I think about it because everything thats in this comic is all the things he has done...anyways this is an amazing comic NICE JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!=D

[Rosieee]

Thiss is pretty awesome

[Anna]

yesss!
i've got one of those "nice guys" following me around at the moment and constantly clinging to me.
GAH.

[Carly]

haha, great comic. Never trust a guy who says "i'm a nice guy" they are just trouble waiting to happen.

[Yue]

ah i read that blog thingy and i couldn't agree more, no one is more logical and more funny when she's pissed off than Rachel the great X3

Man i appricate the guy friends i still have alot more right now, even though i have one nice guy friend, it still makes me feel better that he ain't like that prick that wrote that Nice Guy's are gone because of women crap. I need to appriciate those bone head spazzes i call friends alot more now that i re-read that blog. Thanx Rachel

Oh and when are you coming back??? i miss chu and your comics D:

xo Yue~!

ps. 2nd post on here yay~ :P

[Oasis]

that was THE BOMB! So true! I ove the real nice guy! He's sooo cute! :D

[Ciera]

i would date the nice guy not the "nice guy".the nice guy is so sweet and kind.the"nice guy" would get a kick in the nuts!

[Kylie]

"I'll get the tar you get the feather." lol funny funny...ya did it again!

[Morganaaaaaa]

now it is true that this is not a "one size fits all" comic for two types of guys but in my experience i have known some pretty creepy "nice guys" this one guy got seriously mad cuz i didnt IM him often enough. and then when he would text me if i wouldnt text him fast enough he would text back "oh i guess you dont wanna talk" and try to guilt me into it. anywayz i liked the comic. the point of the actual nice guy friend is that he isnt interested in you on ONLY a sexual level but truely cares about you and wants to be your friend because yall get along.

i <3 this comic

[Jessica]

*Props to poisongirl's comment*
This comic didn't make much sense to me, because sometimes they just aren't so bitchy. Or obvious.XD
It's like it only happens a long time into the relationship; and I don't believe that "nice (as in, like nice&innocent&asexualish) guys" exist either.

[tamara]

i this is one of the best comix that rachel has done.plus it really does help.don't stop writing these comix

[AmorMJ]

I hope that "nice guy" (quotation marks) gets the tar and feathers (LOL), cos let me tell you, if I run into anyone like that, THEY ARE GOIN DOWN!

[E]

Whatever happened to Rachel, anyway? It's been three months since this comic, and it's no longer possible to access her website.

[Owen]

Though there definitely should be a field guide (for both genders, and many stereotypes), this is far from it. Some of the information is fairly insightful, but some is assuming guilt from what could be harmless. Heck, when I'm feeling sad even my CAT sometimes rubs against me, but that doesn't mean I should take it as a sexual advance. And I've been friends with many women that were lesbians that I knew I couldn't be with, but I still gave them hugs when I felt they'd be uplifting.
A large portion of the problem, IMHO, isn't so much people pretending to be nice guys, but women not being happy with actual nice guys. For instance, one page you have a "nice guy" asking why the girl didn't respond, even though a true nice guy might simply be concerned about her welfare, rather than the possessive interrogation that it seems to hint.
Directly after that one, you have a nice guy who "hangs out with you because it's fun," and a 'nice guy' that hangs out because "he secretly wants to have sex with you but is too cowardly to even ask you out." Are you saying that true nice guys don't want sex? Or are you saying that nice guys ask girls out even if they're in committed relationships? And just because a girl is the type you'd date doesn't mean you want to jump in the sack, either.
The next plants seeds of doubt into any girls heart that has ever received a present from a guy, simply because of the word 'yet.' Some guys really do just do nice things for women. I'm friends with one girl that really likes frogs, so when I ended up with a stuffed one, I thought of her and gave it to her. Does that mean she should be worried that eventually I'll want compensation? That seems to be what the comic would encourage: paranoia.

[????]

un...be...lieve...able! KEVIN COSTELLO is a totaly "Nice guy". He's really unstable. He gets pissed for basically no reason at all. And he takes it out on me and my friends. I want to drop him as a friend, but he's always friggin there!!!!

[our katy]

"What I'm not sure of is a females' motives with regard to having a nice guy friend...why do you want to just "hang out' with a guy, anyway? Wouldn't you be better off with girlfriends?"
I think that this is the real problem: we're fed all this stuff through romantic comedies or chick lit or whatever that tells us you just can't be friends with someone of the opposite sex without there being a Motive; the friendship has to grow into something else otherwise it's not worth having at all. And it's not always like that in real life.

[Bri]

Can a friendship with a nice guy ever develop into something more? Should it? or does that mean he was a "nice guy" all along?

[Lineswine]

From a guys perspective, we tend to have female friends that we don't initially fancy, sometimes it just happens.
Equally, women can give some mixed signals too.

Yes, I'd be happy for a female friend to find a guy she's happy with, why not?

The comments about "he was a creep, he just wanted into my pants"..yes that is possible, but are you sure? Not all guys are like that & you may be flattering yourself.

The safest option in "nice guys" as far as women are concerned are gay men - the 100% don't want into your underwear & can discuss things that interest women in great depth.

What I'm not sure of is a females' motives with regard to having a nice guy friend...why do you want to just "hang out' with a guy, anyway? Wouldn't you be better off with girlfriends?

If it surprises you that guys think about sex a great deal, you have an awful lot to learn about men.

[Jordan]

Cripes, I've known too many "nice guys" in my time. They're absolutely unbelievable. The comic is adorable, by the way!

[brit.monkey]

i know a LOT of nice guys...1 i know 4 sure is fake, bcuz when im quiet or act emo, he's always the first 2 try 2 hug me...and i kinda hav a "chest" if u kno what i mean...after that he started wanting hugs all the tyme...and then recently i noticed how hard he was coming on to me, saying sexual-things-and-junk...i didnt even TRY not 2 hurt his feelings...

[Kate (again)]

You can still read her comix on her website I think,it explains on her blog about her leaving gurl for a bit.
I don't think you're a nice guy or a "nice guy", vangar. Just a guy! Sometimes putting people into boxes isn't necessary. Everyone has the potential to be a nice person or a jerkwad...

[Crimsonkiss]

Great Comic! I read somewhere that Rachel has left Gurl, does anyone know if this is true or not? I hope it's not. I don't know what I'll do without my Rachel the Great fix. ;)

[Canulia]

Ha Ha.. That's really funny. I actually know a few "nice guys". They're not my friends or anything, but I heard their conversations about their girl friends. It is disgusting!

[jeejee]

bewbiesssssssssss!

[Vangar]

Am I a nice guy or a "nice guy"? I just broke up with my girlfriend because well she couldn't say she loved me. I still care for her I gave her back all the things that reminded me of her and 220 dollars to hang out with her friends to talk about what an ass I am. I started smoking because I just hate myself right now. I wrote her name on every one in the pack. I in all honesty am beside myself I can't seem to eat right or sleep. I think I'm just looking for pity right now. I left a message for her saying I miss her. Am I a nice guy? Cause I certainly don't feel like one.

[PoisonGirl]

loved this!! it really hit home. i've had soo many guys say they just wanted to be friends when it was obvious they wanted more, and even though i made it clear that nothing more than friendship would come out of the whole thing (and i was WAY blunt, which is how i get when i'm really annoyed hehe), they would still keep at it. sooo freaking annoying. ditching them instantly killed the drama in my life and brought such peace into it lol. get rid of these guys!! they're sooo not worth your time.

[Talbotlynx]

Nice. It got me laughing pretty good. Thankfully I got too many female friends to keep me from slipping into being that kind of creep. lol

[Nia]

Once again, pure genius. It's true about the two different types of nice guys because I've come across both, and I'm lucky to be dating the real thing. Hahaha. I read your livejournal entry, and found it very clever and that the "recovering nice guy" held a thick undertone of b*tchosity.

[Otum]

u no wat, i hav a "nice guy" friend that i've been trying to get rid of for the longest. (thanx for the advice ov tha feathers LOL) :)

[Brielle]

There was this one guy, and he was a "nice Guy", he didn't want to talk to me or go out with me. But, all he wanted to do was stare at me and smile. Once I got to know that he's a real creep, I decided he wasn't worth my time. It was really horriable.

[Meg]

It's sad but it's so true. I have had my share of "nice guys" but I never covered them in tar and feathers, but that is a good idea. JK.

P.S.(love your comix rachel. keep drawing!)

[ella]

oh my god. i had a boyfriend just like that! he was always talking about how nice of a guy he was and how awful and evil all females are. including me, apparently, because he gave me more than enough bullsh/t. it got old real quick. and hes in like 10 of those facebook groups that are devoted to how nice guys arent appreciated. bullll. your comic was dead on :]

[Isa]

i love the comic but may i confirm that if my boyfriend kisses and hugs me and even wanted me to have sex with him when i'm sad, he's considered a 'nice guy'??

[hippiesque]

Oh gosh, I know the type. :/

[Felix]

I am plagued with a "nice Guy" and I knew from the start that he fancied my (sounds like and ego trip but he was very obvious) He's such a pain! GWAR! I need rid of him. and when I flst out reject him, a day later hes like--- "are you sure, can you just check?" and Im like " I dont have to go down to the oven and ask my heart- its right here you know!" and now everytime we have a conversation hes reminding me that "DOESNT have a crush on ANYONe...nope- NO ONE" I could just punch him in the face XD

[zippy]

This is what I suggest. If you want to know if a guy is a nice guy, find out what his friends are like and what he is like around them. Birds of a feather flock together. Dick heads hang out with dick heads. The only real exception to this is if the guy is part of the group out of pity. Then he might have dick head friends that don't really care about him and he might still be a nice guy.

For example: I have a friend who made out with a guy a shit load one day but they never declared themselves dating so after a week he avoided seeing her at all. Dick head. Who does he hang out with? A pompous rich kid fuck head. Coincidence? I think not.

[Sketch]

I knew a "nice guy." He wasn't my "nice guy" though, he was infatuated with my friend. She was a very nice girl, and couldn't bring herself to flat out reject the guy because they had been friends for so long. He thinks he's such a catch, but he's one of those over weight, doesn't bother with trying to look his best, over sensitive, can dish it out but sure can't take it, clingy, stalker types. And I'm not being shallow with my appearance comment, I'm just saying the boy could do SOMETHING.

I used to be friends with him, and I mean real friends. It was my other friend he was always interested in, but now I can't even look at him. I was always there to keep him in check, I wouldn't allow him to play guilt cards or try to pull anything under handed, but this self proclaimed "nice guy" tried to force himself on my best friend not even a month after I moved away.(and I think you all know what I mean by force) Anyway, I really appreciate this comic. It's hard to deal with these guys, and I'm definitely going to send a link to that girl friend of mine. Maybe this can make her see what I've been trying to tell her.

Oh, by the way, we have a real nice guy for a friend too, and he's the one that protected her in my stead.

[Izalebeth]

I've known some of those "nice guys"! Uhg, annoying as anything, I make it clear that they are unwelcome after they start that "but I've always been there for you!" and "I've done everything, why don't you LOVE ME!" (I did, just not in that way, now I don't at all). The REAL nice guy is now my boyfriend. Funny how that works, isn't it?

The only close guy friend I have now is strait as a circle!

[Holly]

LOL. I just the love the opening page with the nice guy saying hello. Very cute.

[Taylor]

Oh man do I know what you mean by this comic! I can relate very well to it. Also I read the livejournal post...laughed so hard my sides hurt. The kind of laugh that makes no noise because it's so hearty. Haha!

I have known many of these guys. They made it seem like I was leading them on...but I wasn't. They played the guilt card one too many times. Once being too many. Luckily I have a few actual nice guy friends. The kind that will be there for me without expecting a blow job in return.