confessions of a dork

she confesses some of her deepest, darkest secrets. find out what they are...

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confessions of a dork

art & story by:
adriana yugovich

Comments

[Rosemarie]

lets see some secrets about me...

1.I get relay horny in social studies class(i don't know why,I just do)
2.I think that if the guy I like wanted to do me in the locker room at lunch, would let him.(i'm not slutty,just weird)
3.I love to read
4.my mom wants me to stay a virgin and not do drugs but I don't think I will.

5.I hate it when someone on an award show says"and I'd like to thank God for giving me this wonderful award" "God" did not give you the Oscar,the trophy girl did.
6.I think I'm an atheist
7.I love to masturbate in the shower
8.I found my cousins porn stash when I was in third grade
9.one day i wanna get baked and watch the video for Lucy in the sky with diamonds.
10.I think all my friends are beautiful even though they call themselves"fat, pimply,ulgly etc."
10.I hate it when people call me Rosemary

[adrienne]

i love the smell of skunks-and i guess im not the only one, i read most of the other comments

i do pick me nose, but not as often as i used to

i have farting contests with my brother. yea

i pee in the shower sometimes

i have back acne but you wouldnt know that because i never wear tank tops

i have worn long sleeves, or sleeves up to my elbow for six months, as of this month because i have had a terrible rash. my dermatologist has me on this cream but obviously its not helping. it all happened because one night i shaved my arms, so its a possibility there razor bumps gone bad. but that same night i also used this body wash crap and i might of got allergic to that. i may never know

i think my comment is too long now so im gonna stop it here

[Mary-Jane]

I hump pillows.
Yeah, I'm that awesome.

[Marriiaaa]

1) I also do the cupcake thing. Yum!
2) I think guys are sexy but i don't think i would ever have more than a crush on them
3) I'm a bisexual (possibly a lesbian)
4) I love the smell of skunks too
5) I talk to my dogs when I'm alone
6) When I'm feeling lonely I pretend I have someone here with me, like a friend or someone I miss
7)I pick my nose when no one is around...I usually put it in a napkin or flick it...
8) I wish i could look like my best friend, she is sooo pretty
9) I have a crush on my friend, but she is straight.
10) I secretly wish I was a hippie or a goth, but my mom won't let me dress like that
11) I masturbate almost every night. Sometimes a few times a day (only on weekends. who has the time on a school night!?)

[jam]

ooo yay i love doing this:
* i like to tell my secrets to strangers.
*i hate periods
*i have never had a real boyfriend
*i had a imaginary friend for a long time, cant remeber till what age
*i talk to myself
*i like picky my scabs
*i think marilyn manson is HOT
*i realy really like blood, not for any real reason i just do?
*i LOVE books
*i get real buggard off when people sing songs by my fav artists or claim that they are their fav atrtists. THEY ARE MINE!!
*i have almost always thought that were ever i am there are camaras watching me.
*when ever i hear that someone had spoke about me i strait away think its bad
*i think i but myself under pressure to much for school

[Ashley]

omg reading that comic like grossed me out so bad

[crystal]

I know who the Sugarcubes are. Good band. Bjork is adorable. ^_^

Okay, here's mine.
1.) You know those people on the other end of the line during a Phone-A-Friend on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" who have the contestant constantly repeat the question and answers? I feel like shooting them in the face.

2.) I'm questioning my sexuality, but my boyfriend has occasional bouts of homophobia, so I'm afraid to really be honest with him about it.

3.) I imagine friends of mine that live countries away are actually in the same room with me, and I sometimes catch myself smiling and talking to the spot I imagine them to be in.

4.) When I get out of the shower, I turn on 80's new wave music and fling my dripping wet hair around. Better than any hairdryer.

5.) I like the sore swollen feeling that my gums get when I eat a fresh crunchy apple.

6.) I like to tip the velvet with Sharpie pens and mascara tubes.

7.) For me, there's no better way to spend a Saturday than sitting at a table in Hastings drinking all the free coffee and reading a copy of "Bust" or "Bitch" magazine.

8.) I live for picking my nose.

9.) I love bitter smells, like gasoline, new cars, the auto section of Wal-Mart, and a freshly opened can of tennis balls.

10.) I'm 20 and have only had one job. It makes me feel like a failure.

[suzzette]

1.I talk to myself
2. i think middle eastern guys are hot (no idea why)
3 i have a huge crush on Gerard butler in the phantom of the opera
4 I'm obsessed with the Sugarcubes (a weird Icelandic band no one knows about)
5 I have dangerously high self esteem
6 i pick my nose (0nly when i'm alone)
7 i still like my first boyfriend

[Blank]

K, so, like, I don't think what you do is that bad, because we're all unique and freaky and quirky in our own way.

1.] If I don't masturbate at night I can't fall asleep.

2.] I talk to myself and tell myself stories, all the time...

3.] I can't forgive anyone for anything, ever, I am incapable.

4.] I focus on tiny things about people and push them away for it.

5.] I think girls are sexy but I would never fall in love with one.

6.] I wish every single day that I was an anime character.

7.] I will only eat pizza with barbeque sauce, only eat peanut butter with blueberris, and only eat tuna with chips.

8.] I like the smell of my dirty sneakers.

9.] I am sociopathic at times, people can be sobbing and in pain and I really don't care at all.

10.] Whenever I hear a little kids voice I want to grab them by the face and smash them into a wall.

Now don't you feel like a better person?

[ruby]

1. i am secretly OBSESSED with twilight
2. im bisexual
3. when i have to pee, i never go right away, i always see if i can hold it in for an hour.. or a few hours
4. i like 3 guys but i dont know who i love
5. i love to listen to 80s music when im home alone and dance like an idiot
6. i was sooo close to moving out of my house
7. i lie about my age a lot
8. i actually think im really pretty but i dont tell people that
9. i hate my best friends :\
10. im probably not going to be a virgin anymore tomorrow :O
11. i want to pull off my nails so badly but like just to see how long it would take to grow back and how it grows back
12. i want to get married and have kids really early, because my mom was really old when she had me and its kinda embarrassing
13. theres so many things i want to tell people, but if i did they would hate me forever

thats about it :)

[Shelby]

I need to get this off my chest,
~I love anime and I sometimes pretend some of the characters are real.
~I eat my toe nails and finger nails
~I love to read Yaoi on FF.net
~I often get jealous of my friends
~I'm not afraid to punch someone in the face if they insult me or my friends
~I think I have OCD
~I can be in silence for more than 5 minutes
~I'm more atracted to boys who aren't my religon or ethnicity
~I've been in love with my best friends boyfriend for longer than she has

[Johanna]

I'm not alone with the cupcake thing?!

[precious]

1) i plan on being a virgin until i get married, but i think of my honeymoon night constantly
2) i love picking my nose. and eating whats on my finger
3) i also do the cupcake thing
4) i talk as if there is someone else when there's no one around becuase i have trust issues. i find it easier to talk to myself than others
5) i think im pretty. no one else does.
6) i get really territorial over the boys i like even though im not their girlfriend
7) i look at people sometimes and wish i had their features
8) i had an imaginary friend until i was about 10 years old named mary. i talked to her every time i used the bathroom, and cried the day i realized i need to grow up and let her go.
11) i have never masturbated, but going to this website makes me interested
12) i drank beer out of an almost empty beer bottle once because i was interested

and thats about it...

[thatgirl]

here are mine:
1. i have slept with my rag doll 'baby girl' since i was 2
2. i USED to pick my nose but only if i had a cold and i was annoting me.
3. I read a brillaint manga-book that has a few porn buts in it, my friends hate it! :P
4. i sometimes make up my own por in my head, when i cant sleep at night.
5.i still call my mum + dad mummy and daddy!! lol
btw, im only 12 so i dont think its that bad....

[sammie]

1.i watch lesbian porn and masterbate after it cuz i get really horny.
2.i'm straight but fantasize of having sex with girls
3. i pick my nose a lot(its kinda big)
4.only 6 guys truly like me
5.i went on vacation to europe 3 years ago and saw this guy and ive dreamed about him everyday since
6.i hate my younger, ugly sister
7.i wish i could have a bigger butt
8.i think my cousin is really hot
9.i imagine things happening and then say it out loud
10.i love to play dolls.

[kylee]

here are mine:
-i used to wash my hair only once a week
-i have a myspace my parents dont know about
-i have an 8th grade bf my parents dont even have a clue who he is (i'm in 7th grade)
-i secretly love starwars
-i pick my nose but like only if it bothers me when i breathe
-i can wear the same bra for weeks
-some of my friends smoke...i dont tho

although i have a few weird probs between myself & my family i happen to be friends with everybody.

[hana]

confessions!!
- i've never had a real boyfriend
- i do the muffin thing :)
- sometimes when i listen to my ipod i pretend that its backround music in a movie that im in( its actually kinda amazing!)
- i dont know if I believe in god and i go to a religious school
- i sing things in my sleep
- i love arthur
- i dance in the rain like an idiot
- i wear huge clothes because i think im fat
- sometimes im scared that someone bugged my room and is always watching me....
- i always believe my horoscope
and.... yea. there you are

[calliste]

1) I like to smoke only on weekends.
2) I made two guys cheat on their girlfriends.
3) I've dated someone much older than me. (I'm seventeen)
4) I made out with my cousin.
5) I like to read Time and Newsweek...but not in front of my friends.
6) I never had a real boyfriend...because I didn't want to commit.
7) I wear thongs under my dresses at church.
8) I secretly like school and make good grades.
9) I fake conversations on my phone to pass time in a crowded place. (I'm kind of shy)
10) I live in a very Southern place...and I've always been attracted to black guys.
11) I use my image as a goody to cover up my mistakes.
12) I never want to marry until I'm thirty.
13) I pay close attention to politics.
14) I play video games sometimes.
15) I switch guys every week because I like to test myself.
16) I secretly buy food for the hobos in front of restaurants.
17) I am incapable of talking on the phone in crowded places.
18) I imitate phone ringing when I'm in a very quiet room. (pretty convincing too)

[marina]

IS THAT A WEEZER SHIRT IN #10?
anyway,
1. i eat oranges ONLY when i'm watching the Ellen Show
2. when i can't sleep, basically every night, i picture myself as a rockstar, giving interviews and stuff like that
3. i read my brother's old comics (note: my brother's 10 years old... :S)
4. i talk to the tv when i'm home alone
5. i have a crush in the nerdiest guy in my class, and he still doesn't even look at me (if that's not dorky, what is it?)
6. i love wearing mismatched clothes. it'll become a trend someday
7. i like clipping my toenails and then chewing them (of course, after shower)
8. when i listen to music, i imagine the video for the songs, and i always picture the exact same video in my mind
9. i watch superhero cartoons and, of course, Spongebob.
10. i love weird vegetables, like coliflower or stuff like that

and many many more.

[Lexi]

1. I secretly hate myself
2. I've tried to make myself throw uo
3.I've never had a boyfriend or had a boy like me
4.i wish i had superstar teeth
5.I wish i was white
6.i have a crush on Obama
7.I have alot of friends but i feel alone.
8.I cut myself on purpose before
9.Im questioning my sexuality i like guys but sometimes i see a girl that i think is pretty but im not sure if that makes me a lesbian or bisexual or something
10. I hate my period
11.I'm envious of my sister

[Trill]

1. Sometimes I panic because I think my thoughts are being projected above my head from everyone to see them.
2. I secretly hope that someone EXACTLY like the comic book version of The Joker exists... and falls madly in love with me.
3. I don't believe in god.
4. I've never had a boyfriend.
5. I've told my friends that I've known a bunch of guys who have liked me when really I've only ever known three
6. Sometimes I want to move away and not tell any of my friends just to see their reaction
7. I have a Voldamort action figure on my fireplace mantle
8. If my grandma died tomorrow I'm not sure I'd be sad...
9. I've lied about my entire life to someone before.
10. I'm fairly positive my parents like my sister better than me

[Bethy]

1) I LOVE school
2) I play Sims 2
3) I my middle two on my left foot is longer then my big toe (Eww..)
4) My I never cut my two nails! (They're like 2cm long)
5) I would rather go on the computer than go out.
6) I go on internet shopping sites and then imagine i'm using/wearing it.
7) I don't go to sleep at night. I watch TV
Thats it I think...
Oh I do the cupcake thing to! And it tastes goooooood!

[Elise]

- i secretly hate my parents

[Eve Z.]

ok:

- i slept with 3 guys in less than an year after starting my sexual life
- i lost virginity at 21
- 22 and never had a job
- i like to pick my nose and look at my snots - oh yeeeaaaah!
- I like to pop my acne and look at it - even more high feeling!
- I like to play The Sims 2
- I like wayching cartoons
- I'm bouying W.I.T.C.H. magazine and my 12 year old cousin does this too...
- i like asking the cards and I believe in it.
- I like... have a date with a green-eyed guy at 5 pm. the cards told me some time that I'll meet a green eyed guy and I made the connection.

had enough? :D ;)

[Liz]

ok. confession time!!
-i think im bi
-i pick my nose sometimes
-i bite my nails
-i masturbate every nite
-i watch porn sometimes
-16 and never had a job
-only have had 2 bfs and they only lasted about 3 weeks
-im self concious about my weight, but everyone says i look fine
-i have a tutu and a tiara and like to take pics with them

i think thats all u need to know ^_^

[deb]

hey ppl here r some of my secrets

1-Last night i had some ice cream even though im on a diet and i prob went way off my calories
2-when im home alone i blast the jo bros and start dancing around the living room,even though i tell everybody i hate them
3-i still play with barbies(i hav a younger cuz)
4-i had a crush on a guy named chris in 5th grade and on the last day of school he made me cry by telling me to go die.and it prob will shock to hear that i forgave him and i might still hav a crush on him.i dont kno.(but i did call him all the cuss words i kno several times(in my head))yea i kno im a wimp
5-im a nerd even though im really popular9at least i think i am)
peace out lol

[Heath]

Haha.

1. I swear. My parents do not know this. My favorite thing right now is "Douche Bag".

2.I have never had a boyfriend.

3. Not sure if this is a secret-But I HATE real life "sweet moments/sad moments". I can not stand it at ALL.

4. -Not a secret, but felt like sharing this- I love anime. =]

5.-Not exactly a secret- When I'm home alone(not often. To many people) I blast "SexyBack". xD I live by old people.

6.Sometimes I actually forget to eat. Some times there will be days where all I eat is like a sandwich.

7.I am so paranoid that someone is watching me at ALL times. I can't just walk around the house in weird clothes without worrying that someone I know is watching me for blackmail.
xP

[Emily]

1.i've done this befor i just decided to do it again
2.i am an only child so i have a imagineary little 3yr old sister named leah hope
3.i do it w/ my pillow every night
4. i pick my nose and eat the boogers
5.my dads best frnd kissed me and my mom they think its just like kissing family but i find it uncomfortable!
6.one of my ex besties taught me how to have sex{we didnt do it together tho} (shes crazy i swear, she has mental problams or something)!

[Beth]

1.i pick my nose and eat it
2. i masturbate with my hairbrush or the remote
3.i do the cupcake thing
4.i really hate my pubic hair
5.i have a bf but my parents dont know
6.i pop my zits and eat the puss
7.i bite my finger nails
ad i am not a bi and i am a army brat

[paige]

my confessions are like, really common, even if u don't admit it, YOU'RE DOING IT!

1. Masturbate
2. Pick my nose
3. Makeout with the pillow at night
4. I'm also socially challenged =[ .. if i go to a party and dont know anyone, i'll stand in a corner until someone comes over =P
5. I find it easier to talk to boys than girls =S

i cant think of anymore =P

[sonia]

haha well i have confessions like that
- i pick my nose too! though i through them out... i only do this when nobodies looking ofcourse
- Most of the guys i've really liked, ive liked for more than two years, but never went out with them
- i do the same thing with my cupcakes.
- I like to pop my zits... especially when its the ones that fly out on to the mirrior, or stay in the same form.
- Sometimes i like to just climb trees... all day for no reason
- I dont like wearing socks. they make me feel weird.

[Brianne]

-I plan on being a virgin for life
-I make out with a pillow
-I have "sex" with said pillow
I get urges to jump off of buildings. Not to commit suicide, but to se if I can fly.
-I pick my nose and eat it
-I pick scabs, mostly to get scars
-I'm not bi, but I'd do Idina Menzel in a minute
-I change with the window open, in the hopes that someone would actually want to look at me naked
-I buy candy cane when they go on half-price in January, and eat them in the summer.

[marina]

there's MORE!!
-i love correcting people or telling them they're morons
-i broke the school toilet :S

[marina]

well i have TONS of confessions
-sometimes when i talk to other people on the phone and they talk too much, i watch tv or something and then i say "yeah" if i hear silence.
-i'm obsessed with that rubick cube
-when i like a song, i play it over and over and over again like 40 times.
-when i can't sleep, i imagine my wedding dress (that's so pathetic, but is boring enough to help me sleep...)
-i added myself in msn so that if nobody is online i at least have myself (:s)
-i secretly admire myself (mwahaha)

[liza]

oh yeah! sometimes i think im might be bi-sexual too! and that worries me a lot! not becuz is a bad thing, but becuz what my parents or friends cud think about me =$

[liza]

xD i love confessions
but for the girls that say they have low self esteem, i just wanted to say that ur a amazing and beautiful. sometimes i feel pretty bad about myself but i try not to be, so plz dont be it =)
..uh i think that sounded stupid but.. i just wish you could be happier with yourselves =)
luv ya!

[Nisa]

-I LOVE Anime, so if you think youre the only one who does, youre not. I cosplay as L from deathnote alot.
-I play video games as much as a guy would. I cant help it...
-I watch SciFi and the discovery channel as if its going to be cancelled the next day.
-Ive only had 3 boyfriends, those of which all lasted less than a month.
-I have the lowest self esteem ever.
-Its extremely hard for me to talk to guys, I just DONT KNOW what to say to them, and my friends MAKE me try to talk to them but its awkward due to the fact that I am so self-concious and afraid that they would make fun of me for trying so hard.
-I am always depressed and emo, though I try not to be.
-If I have a pimple or a cut or something I cant live with it. I end up popping it or peeling the scab.
-People are scared of me at school because they think Im evil.
-I have alot of boyish personalities, although I DONT dress like a guy. I burp out loud, I trip over myself, I bite my fingernails and alot more.
-I would never wear pink or a skirt if my life depended on it.

[mrs dj dangaaa(:]

My Confessions:
1. i masturbate.
2. i've never had a boyfriend.
3. i'm extremely self concious.
4. i weigh more than my mom does.
5. i've thought of running away.
6. my mom has called me fat and ugly before.
7. i'm depressed constantly.
8. cute boys never like me.
9. i do the muffin thing also(:
10. i think im bi-sexual.[and my mom would FREAK if she knew.]

those are my confessions.
i'm sure theres more, but i prob just cant think of them at the momment(:

[liza]

mY confeSsions
~ im still virgin (18 yo)
~ i masturbate
~ i make out with my hand
~ i might be in love with my best friend but i think he isnt good lookin so i just cant admit im in love with him
~ i talk to myself at loud..i still have an imaginary friend..she doesnt have a name, but shes fat and wears glasses
~ i ignore cute guys, specially if i like em
~ i used to throw up everything i ate when i was like 15, but stopped bcuz my mom was suspecting
~ i cant quit on smoking
~ i like to get drunk, really..
~ i absolutely hate when ppl spell my name wrong..is Liza, not Lisa or lissa or Lizza
~ i have only had one bf..and he was ugly..
~ im addicted to playing ragnarok online, and i kinda suck at pc games
~ i love biology and chemistry
~ i hate my pubic hair, i have a lot (gross)
~ before sleeping, i always imagine im with this really hot guy, who is my bf, and we are making out or having sex
~lately, this guy has been Beto from my classroom..

well, i culd go on..but thats enough already :)
xx

[j]

picking my nose, not ever having a REAL job or boyfriend, not really having alot of guy friends and ignoring guys usually (unless I'm laughing at/with them), loving stupid "pre-teen" dramas, finding this year's AI guys not just cute but actually sexy, masturbating, I'm afraid of 1) bees 2) my apendex rupturing 3) clogged toilets, and other not-so-much-confessions as much as bad/stupid secrets.....
I know, weeeeeeeeeeiiirrrrrdd.

[Mary Kate]

1. I love the feeling of walking barefoot through wet grass.
2. I pick my scabs
3. I like being offensive
4. I would rather read a book then to go out
5. I find sleep to be unnecessary
6. Even though I am the oldest of all my friends; I am the least mature
7. I am 17, and have never had any sort of job.
8. Both my pinky toe's lack a nail
9. I like to watch people while they drive
10.(This is awful, but I was young! Like six years old!) I use to tell my grandfather different names when he would ask who I was. He had alzheimer's and could never remember who I was.

[K]

please tell me these things are made up to make the comic more interesting

[J.J]

I Loooooeve the cupcake!
Its great! :D

[mia]

10. I look at my poop before flushing to see how much I pooped
9. I've never had a real boyfriend (I'm 20)
8. I'm obsessive-compulsive about grammar and syntax
7. I've always dreamed of being a mermaid
6. I watch anime
5. I can quote anime lines in Japanese
4. I cosplay
3. I like Chemistry and Biology
2. I like to read (and can understand to an extent) scientific journals
1. I love to play Dungeons and Dragons

[Terra]

1. Every guy I've ever liked wound up with a prep
2. I absolutly love anime
3. I love school
4. I have more fun at my best friend's house watching anime with two other friends than going to hawaii
5. I completely freak out whenever I get a B.
6. When I like a guy, I completely ignore him. (Sad, I know)
7. I would NEVER wear a pink (or any other girly color) skirt to school.
8. My most recent crush has an affro and big glasses.
9. My favorite song is "Oh Oh Oh Sexy Vampire"
10. I LOVE to make an idiot of myself. XD

[Dominique]

My confession is that~i curse behind my parents back~I get jealous alot~and at night i make out with the pillow~and talk 2 myself

[Dominique]

I am not a dork, but at my school I am known as "the nice one." I talk to anyone whose anyone, an me very kind to them.
*But I do have to say~dat picking your nose part and putting it on the seat and desk........was pretty disgusting

[Emily]

um okay heres my confessions:i pick my nose but i do not flick it... i EAT it,i am very unsafe sometimes like i have a kinda boyfriend i met in a chat room,i fanisize about david archaletta from american idol i think he's soo hot,sometimes i brag..i mean everyone does it its natural but i do a little scratch that out a LOT, i am an only child so i pretend that i have a little 3yr. old sister named leah hope,i curse behind my parents back,i am 11 years old and i wanna have sex i want to so bad that i do it with my pillow. well thats about it!

[deveney & clarissa]

We r totally best friends! We,I(clarissa) guess, r sort of dorks too!We both eat the wrapper of the cupcake,and we sleep with stuffed animals. However,....the cloud thing thinking crap looks like a butterfly is super GROSS!!!!!!!!! (Deveny)And the pickin an flickin is sooooooooooooo funie!

[Gingie]

HAAHAAHAAA
I am a dork but not that bad